Humility in Doses

The collective air had been sucked out the town

with the madness now over.

Their team had lost

but their guys were were getting their recognition

A  pleasant weekend of chasing pickup ball

all over town and now we were in the park

enjoying the waning daylight

It was good to see her again–

to finally know there were no grudges held on either side

No doubt I could’ve handled things

with more delicacy and tact.

She was just doing what young women do at that age

We talked for about an hour;

neither of us really saying anything.

Avoiding any past details that led

to touching each other’s faces

early into the night;

caught somewhere between

convenience and necessity,

lust and tenderness,

tepid and cavalier,

wrecking the perception of friendship

I know what I should’ve done

even while I hurriedly packed

running from feeling broken and disappointed.

She looked in good spirits

and that felt good.

But the biggest difference was that I was finally happy.

I hadn’t failed myself after all

And as it turned out I’d left

at exactly the right time–

again and again (soon to be) again

I felt the sudden sense of satisfaction

towards my lovers (all of them).

Happy for all of them

and happy about all of them.

Knowing that they were all the right ones

And knowing that none of them were the right ones.

The chimes from the city clocks went off.

The wind stiffened.

There was about an hour of daylight left.

She and I hugged it out in the middle of the park

before I got in my vehicle and left town.

~Edward Austin Robertson

Tags: Edward Austin Robertson