14 Jun

That's 1 (800) FREE-GRO!!!!!! Call NOW!!!!

That's 1 (800) FREE-GRO!!!!!! Call NOW!!!!

In certain social circles, I’m a very square dude.

One day my little brother(the one who peed in the Mark Twain river not the one who tried to grab his own turd with a paper towel) was looking through my cd collection.

Back then there was mostly jazz and a few Radiohead discs, probably some Marvin Gaye.

He looks at me and says Man ain’t you got some black music? Of course to me, it doesn’t get more militant, more urban, or ethnic, more pro-black than jazz music. But how could I possibly explain this to my Lil Flip listening, American Pimp watching little bro.

But it was around this time I realized what side of the divide I was on in other people’s eyes. I just wasn’t black enough, even though I know more about African American culture and history than the average cat around (minus hip hop fads and trends I’m talking people, events), I was labeled as someone who was an Oreo, a white man in a black mans body, a “blippy”.

which of course begs the question how is a black man supposed to behave? and according to who’s and what definition did it mean to be black?

I’ve seen Chappelle’s skit on “I know Black People” and yes it is true for a certain amount of us. Yet where do people like me fit in?

Hi I’m Bobby Mickey, Cosmic Comic. You may have seen me in such projects as The Ed Forman Show Starring ME Ed Forman!!!!, Black Guy Funny Phone Sex, and in the role of six year old defendant on television’s Night Court.

I’m here to talk to you about joining the NBEC. Now some of you are wondering what the NBEC is and how to join? Well is your skin as dark as mine? Do you have more than 10 white friends and less than five black friends? Well if so, then you’re eligible to join the Not Black Enough Coalition.

Before I formed the NBEC, I used to have to hide my U2 and Tears for Fears albums when my black friends came over to hang out. But now I have plenty of black companions to accompany me in evenings of playing chess, taking acid and listening to Grateful Dead.

Some of you are out there saying, but Bobby Mickey, I’m not black. Well that’s okay. Because the NBEC isn’t just for black men, but it’s also for white women who like to SLEEP with black men. So act now and we’ll throw in a complementary glass bong with a copy of De La Soul’s 3 Feet High and Rising.

Call now at 1(800) FREE-GRO

and ask for Bobby.

And please remember, it’s not selling out, it’s buying in.

So the next time your relatives say, “Man college really changed you, hanging out with those white folks got you listening to weird music and eating rabbit food.”

Call us and you won’t have to feel guilty about saying” Hey if living healthy,listening to good music, and not spending my money on rims and stereo equipment makes me white, then call me a cracker.

You can call me a honky, just don’t CALL me when you need money for a triple bypass, cuz I’m not trying to hear it. Now get out of my office………………… You NIGGER!!!!!!!!”


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