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Off Limits

7 Apr

She sat a perched the sofa
one hand propped against her cheek,
face tilted; arctic eyes piercing at 3 ‘o clock,
body angled symmetrically,
feet dangling ,
legs curled behind her thighs
and buttocks.

A younger version of me would have gotten myself in trouble.
18 yr old me would have pined over her
agonizingly in my bedroom,
writing sappy poetry;
trying to find a word to rhyme with Eros.
25 yr old me would have
driven myself crazy trying to bed her and keep her.

I don’t miss those days.
I still wince embarrassingly of the times
when I shot at every game that I liked.
I appreciate being at an age where I can delight in a lady’s presence
and not have to get in their pants.

But if the opportunity presented itself,
I’m not sure I’d have been able to say no.
Though I respected her boyfriend
–a wonderful young man
witty and understated–
it didn’t stopped me from fantasizing
about rubbing the small of her back,
kissing her bare neck,
then making love as if we were two ballerinas.

Only now can I project far enough ahead to know
there aren’t many positive outcomes
for such delicate situations
if you aren’t equipped to handle them.

But sometimes………
on the right days…..
when I’m felt at my most Alpha………
I found it extremely difficult to be alone with her.

Thank God for experience.

~Edward Austin Robertson~

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Sunny

6 Apr

Watching the Elite Eight
on our front porch
with Geo and Maged.

Checking out a girl on the roof
giving us upskirt shots.

Sometimes happiness comes so easily.

~Edward Austin Robertson

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Groan

6 Apr

Sleep.
I need more.
In the dead of winter
I’ll take food and warmth
when I can.
But sleep.
I don’t want to need it.
And where would I sleep
if I stopped going to work?

Time to get out of bed.

~Edward Austin Robertson

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Where Do The Years Go?

27 Feb

How does one make life slow down?

You live long enough
and certain present moments
parallel certain past moments.

So many people sleeping, partying, working their lives away.
In the blink of an eye
I went from being a 19 year old kid pulling my pud to Vanessa Del Rio videos
to becoming a 35 year old man
on the fringes of society;
wondering if my next piece of ass
will come in the form of anything but a 22 year old white chick.

My early 20’s seemed to lag in the mud
as I waited for something to happen to me.
Life was wide open then.
I had nothing but time to do whatever I wanted.

My mid twenties were spent preparing for something to happen to me.
The last 8 years of my life spent making something happen.

Life can appear to change so quickly.

~Edward Austin Robertson

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Jumped the Gun

18 Feb

Ruined things with our impatience
before there was ever a chance to become friends.
In no hurry to meet hatred
from someone new.

~Edward Austin Robertson

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Snong

17 Feb

Snow in the bong
Cool icy air hitting the lungs
softens the hit
mellows the mind
A skiing sensation
a freeing sensation.

~Edward Austin Robertson

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Geeking out on Patti Smith’s “Easter”

6 Feb

Easter Sunday, we were walking.
Easter Sunday, we were talking.
Isabel, my little one, take my hand. time has come.

Isabella, all is glowing.
Isabella, all is knowing.
And my heart, Isabella.
And my head, Isabella.

Frederick and Vitalie, savior dwells inside of thee.
Oh, the path leads to the sun. brother, sister, time has come.

Isabella, all is glowing.
Isabella, all is knowing.
Isabella, we are dying.
Isabella, we are rising.

I am the spring, the holy ground,
The endless seed of mystery,
The thorn, the veil, the face of grace,
The brazen image, the thief of sleep,
The ambassador of dreams, the prince of peace.
I am the sword, the wound, the stain.
Scorned transfigured child of Cain.
I rend, I end, I return.
Again I am the salt, the bitter laugh.
I am the gas in a womb of light, the evening star,
The ball of sight that leads that sheds the tears of Christ
Dying and drying as I rise tonight.

Isabella, we are rising.
Isabella, we are rising . . .

~Patti Smith~

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Snow Day

5 Feb

Everyone was beautiful because everyone felt happy.
“Happy Snow Day” was his greeting to all trudging by–
the college kids screaming, squealing and howling their “woo hoo’s!”
drunk, or on their way to getting there.
He wasn’t a fan of the cold
but the winters in Kansas gave him a sense of time and place;
creating evocative images to vividly recall years later.
The safety net of the quiet neighborhood
draped in unmolested snowfall,
walking down the empty street while a man shoveled his driveway.
A decision to step out of that comfortable chaos
into the unknown
reminded him that happiness was a decision.
It was as if God had deemed that today
would be a perfect day
and he wouldn’t have to try one bit to make it work.

~Edward Austin Robertson
2014-02-04 17.14.36

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12/21/12

29 Nov

Armageddon could have been outside and it wouldn’t have mattered to me.
If this were the last night on Earth
then I was right where I was supposed to be.

My warm bed
her warm body
the warmth between the sheets
–the warmth between her thighs.

Of course I didn’t believe that this was the end
but if so,there were much worse ways to die.

~Edward Austin Robertson

Casual

29 Nov

An innocuous invite to listen to Smiths and make out
could so easily turn into a care-free romp
to some P- Funk.

Those were the cavalier days
before concerns
about others’
feelings
were considered.

Oh what I would do
to see her smile again.

She turned out to be nothing
like I wanted.

But for a brief moment
we were there
she had let go
and we were free
and alive.

~Edward Austin Robertson

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